I just want to say that I no longer have any real anger...
I'm just so very very sad that what we had to end like this.
I know you are very angry with me for going twice into chat room, but why did you leave mirc installed and configured to go in there on my machine?
I was trying to deal with what had happened by telling myself that you were going ostensibly for a job - You told me about the job in July , that leads to knowing you were even thinking of leaving me then. when I found out otherwise I was just so crushed and angry isn't that understandable?
I wrote what I wrote in my blog with almost the best of intentions - yes I wanted to cause your new friend some discomfort - it seems a big thing that people don't know who he really is. But I tried to be fair to us in what I wrote and it's now hidden.
I spent the weekend in Southampton and it was the most horrible I've had in a long time, knowing that I would be 100% unwelcome in W even just to try to put things on a less fraught note.
I know you are very angry, but please try to remember I am the person you loved for almost 20 years and I haven't fundamentally changed I'm the person who has tried to be there for you when it has really mattered and it bothers me, no, it causes me despair that you no longer have any regard for me at all.
Thank you for hiding your twitter feed
R
Just one final thing, I don't know if it was your intention but I can not look at or even think about the 'tl:dr' you put on your last email without crying my eyes out - please don't be that mean to me.
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